ymoore4health

Grief is an aspect of our mental health that all of us will experience at some time in our lives. The loss that we grieve does not have to be of a loved one. It can be the loss of any part of your life that you cherish. It can be anything from a job to a dream and anything and everything you might hold dear.

I thought that after five years as a widow, I would have done all of the “firsts.” This month however, I am doing two more firsts. Last week I went to my first wedding as a widow when my beautiful cousin Danielle got married in Texas. I was very emotional but my sadness was overshadowed by the joy of watching she and Tanner start their new life together. It was also a blessing to see and talk to the older of my only two maternal aunts, Betty Jean, who will be 88 next month. She is such a beautiful, feisty little lady who almost stole the show from her granddaughter the bride. As I spent time talking to her and reminiscing about my Grandmother (MaDear), the lady that raised us both, I realized how priceless these conversations were that only she and I could have! I love it that at 71, she is the only person left in my life who still calls me “baby.”😊

This weekend I am traveling to LA for the first time since my hubby, James, died. I have so many happy memories of the times he and I traveled there to visit family and attend Dodgers, Lakers and Rams games! That man was all about his LA sports teams! As I sit here on the plane choking back tears, I cannot imagine being in LA without him. Only my role as self proclaimed “groupie mom” to my daughter Kyra could make me go back to LA alone. I wanted to be present for her performance of the show she is producing and starring in which is ironically called “Grief Party.”

That’s the thing about grief, it never really leaves you. Over time you get better at suppressing it but just when you think it is gone, it blindsides you in ways you never anticipate. It is an ever evolving part of your life forever because it really is just “love with no place to go.” I praise God daily for keeping me in the dark moments and allowing me to continue to enjoy the wonderful life that I still have. 

For those of you who are on your own grief journey, let me encourage you that just because you still have periods of sadness months and even years after loss does not mean you are stuck! Two things can be true at the same time. You can be sad and still have joy in the midst of it. That is how God made us! It is amazing how those tears can turn into smiles in the blink of an eye as you cherish bittersweet memories. It is my prayer for you that you are able to give yourself grace as your grief continues to evolve.

“Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.”

‭‭III John‬ ‭1‬:‭2‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Yvonne Moore